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Thursday, 27 February 2014

Double Standards for Stay-at-Home Dads

"I have a brother in law who is the stay at home parent and his wife is the breadwinner. They agreed that is what works for them. His wife's family (my inlaws) have all called him lazy, a mooch, and a deadbeat along with a few choice words. Yet, my sister in laws, who are stay at home parents, that's okay. It's okay for them to stay home and drink and do whatever but not okay for him to stay home and actually take care of things."

"When a woman does it, it's the hardest job in the world that involves such great self-sacrifice on her part. It is deserving of praise and appreciation.
When a man does it, he's a useless leech living off his wife and why would any woman want to be with someone "unambitious" like that?"

"Damned if you do, damned if you don't. If you do stay at home with the kid(s), you're a wimp, pathetic, if you don't, it's because you're unable."

I'm sure many of us men would rather be the nurturer than a worker. Too bad much of society still treats the idea like heresy. This likely stems from the same fear of tall girl/short boy couplings: gender roles.

Or it's simply nature at work (again?):

"The natural desire in women want men to be the protector provider, which is why the "house husband" is not see as attractive in itself and tends to make women less attracted to them. To me its part of the basic instinctual desires that both men and women have. We prefer to think women are "above" it all, but women are just humans like men."

Why the fuck was I born amongst a bunch of cavemen and cavewomen?

I just want some experiment where a child is raised with totally reversed gender norms, where the heroes on their TV are women and the men are housewives, but that would be inhumane since the kid would be totally confused once returned to reality. Not possible to fabricate such an environment and have volunteers anyway.

Still, let's say our experiment involves a girl who's setup to become a CEO or President. Women are the focus of politics, sports, and et cetera in her world. Bigger is not better, but rather deemed a threat, so men are regulated to housework. I know this is a sick hypothesis, but that's the basis behind sexism (women are weaker thus men should rule) so play along with me here.

If size and masculinity are no longer celebrated, would this girl still wake up one day and think, "my primal urge is telling me to wash dishes while a man leads me?" It's worth a thought.

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