What the Fuck Is This Height Article From The Guardian?

https://archive.is/gyyDd

This article is out of control. Seriously. Skim through it. I thought April Fools' came early. Are they saying that if your child is taller than you, then you'll submit to them?

They also equate being bigger with being taller, so that's nice. That mentality totally doesn't create morons like this guy.