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Monday, 10 February 2014

How to Kiss (aka GTFO Short Men)

"A man must be able to sweep a woman into his strong arms, tower over her, look down into her eyes, cup her chin in his fingers, and then bend over her face and plant his eager, virile lips on her moist, slightly parted, inviting ones," he writes. All of these are impossible where the woman is the taller of the two. When the situation is reversed, the kiss becomes a ludicrous banality. Now, if the man were shorter, this would be ALL WRONG. OK, are all the short men gone now? Good."

Amusingly, the above was posted on a Malaysian website where average male height is 5'5. I know height is relative, but it's funny because a typical Malaysian man would be the one getting brushed off in the West. Whoever runs the Malay site doesn't give a shit though, because they're too busy enforcing gender norms over in Malaysia.

Anyway, a shorter man kissing a taller girl is weird for the same reason homosexuality is weird. Growing up, all we ever see on TV is a big man kissing a smaller woman, so anything else is not the norm.

If you need visual representation on this topic, here's the picture that site used:

Height difference ain't even that great.

 Now here's a picture of Wolverine:

They look fine hot to me.

I had to use a fucking comic book because Googling a short boy kissing a tall girl only shows comedy pictures. Search for the opposite and you'll find oh so romantic images of troooo luurrve. You know, the kind of true love where if the man suddenly shrunk a foot, their relationship would be "ALL WRONG?" Sadly, that's the mentality of most couples so it's no wonder why many end up divorced.

I read that only 4.1% of couples have a taller woman. I know men are taller on average, but that statistic is contrived if I've ever seen one. Somebody found that the true statistic of short boy/tall girl couples should be 7.8%, almost double. I know the difference seems negligible, but just remember that there are millions of couples. This means thousands of men and women are purposely avoiding unconventional kisses.

You can't argue that this is "biological preference" at work, because the very origin of kissing is still up in the air. Of course, someone's gonna argue it anyway:

"My understanding is that women throughout the world, even in traditional tribal cultures, prefer men a few inches taller than themselves, and stronger than themselves. Isn’t this likely because one of the things women seek in a mate is safety and protection? Since it’s universal, couldn’t it be (horrors!) innate? Couldn’t it be that it became a social norm because women and men who made that kind of pairing were more successful than those that chose the taller woman pairing?"

First, one of the last remaining tribal cultures in the world have been examined, and male height had nothing to do with their mate selection (see here). Ironically, it's modern society which has a fixation on height. Secondly, a shorter man is still (on average) stronger than a taller woman, but that doesn't matter, does it? Finally, 50% of marriages end up in divorce, so the 95.9% of big man/small woman couples aren't working so well these days. Even if they were once "more successful" in the past, it was on a shallow and primitive scale that holds no value now. Yet most still go out of their way to reinforce this archaic cardinal rule.

How about people just admit they're a bunch of brainwashed, conforming morons who follow gender norms? After all, scientists readily admit that humans have a history of herd mentality, but when it comes to height, it's "innate." Convenient.

Give me a break. All these cavemen and cavewomen with their height worship can go fuck themselves with their innate excuses.

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